What Is Self-Forgiveness?
What Is Self-Forgiveness?
It is much easier for most of us to forgive others than it is to forgive ourselves. Some of us hold on to our mistakes from the past and continue to have regrets and suffer, crucify, and punish ourselves for the rest of our lives. So, what exactly is self-forgiveness and why is it important?
Self-forgiveness is your ability to acknowledge, and accept that you made a mistake, forgive yourself, and take the appropriate actions to rectify what is in your control with yourself or others if your behavior has caused them to suffer and if it is not possible to rectify then letting the resulting resentment, guilt, shame, anger, despair, and all the hurt go by growing, transforming and learning lessons from the experience.
It is practiced as an act of self-love and it is therefore independent and not reliant on the other person’s actions, behavior, capability, and capacity to accept your forgiveness which is not at all in your control. You forgive yourself for your own benefit so you can feel at peace on the inside.
So, you may be wondering, why is self-forgiveness important. Let’s discuss that next.
Why Is Self-Forgiveness Important?
Self-forgiveness is important because it is an act of unconditional love toward yourself. It is also empowering to know that you are not perfect nor should your ever pressure yourself to ever aspire to be. It is a way to accept and take full responsibility for your actions and it is known to improve your confidence, self-esteem, and worth.
What Happens If You Do Not Forgive Yourself?
The stuck energy of regret, resentment, and anger can lead to other adverse mental and physical health issues and conditions. Without self-forgiveness, it would be very hard for you to be motivated, and hopeful for your future, and to live your best confident, joyful, meaningful, purposeful, fulfilling, and impactful life.
It is also hard to fully forgive others and have no regrets or resentment toward them if you cannot practice compassion, kindness, and forgiveness toward yourself.
Let’s discuss next how to learn self-forgiveness
7 Ways To Learn How To Forgive Self
The sooner you can learn to forgive yourself, be at peace with your past, and let go of the resentments and regrets, the better it is for your well-being. It is very important to learn to forgive yourself because it is inevitable that you will make mistakes in life. After all, no human being is perfect. Always aim to be real, and authentic rather than perfect.
Here are 7 ways for you to learn how to forgive yourself.
Stop Dwelling On The Past
Learn to stop dwelling on past mistakes and wasting your energy and present moments which will never come back. Your past cannot be changed and so learn to accept it instead of trying to control it and reliving it over and over again in your mind and torturing yourself. Spend your energy on focusing on the now moments instead which are guaranteed.
Remember you create your future from your identity, beliefs, and thoughts that you think today so choose wisely. Always be aware of your automatic habitual thoughts and change them if they do not match your desired future life.
Move Forward
Move forward and do not get stuck in self-hate, impeding your growth, and obsessing over what you did in the past. Life is a gift and it is to be lived with joy every single day that you are blessed with. You are not what you did. Life always happens for you, not to you. Reflect and learn lessons from your past, and grow and transform yourself from these experiences. The bigger and better version of yourself that you become the bigger and better way you can then serve and help others.
Reflect On Your Consciousness
Know, accept, and reflect on your consciousness in the past when you made a mistake and now. You are not the same person that made that mistake. You have transformed, matured, and grown physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally and are at a different level of maturity and consciousness.
Cut yourself some slack and stop punishing yourself for something that your past lower self did. Remember we are here on this earth to grow and serve. One of the ways to grow is by learning from your mistakes which is simply feedback.
Acknowledge Your Shadow Self
Learn to journey inward and acknowledge that the mistakes you made were a result of your shadow self (which is not good), that every one of us has, expressing itself. Who you are is an individualized expression of your creator. Your value does not diminish because of what you did. Know that who you are at the essence is based on the qualities of your soul and it is always good.
You are compassion, kindness, love, peace, joy, and abundance by nature and so learn to reflect these in your actions daily. Your soul is a part of your creator and it can never be bad. Your true nature is good. You are a divine soul that is having a temporary human experience.
Having A Creative Outlet
Have a creative outlet available to express and process your grief, resentments, regrets, and its associated negative energy instead of simmering in it forever. You can scream, draw a picture in color depicting how you are feeling, dance and release the negative energy or come up with any other way that you like to accomplish your release of the negative energy.
Figure out Your Unmet Needs
Figure out what unmet needs within you or the unmet needs of your inner archetype keeps coming up and trying to express themselves. Acknowledge it, the lessons learned from the past, and meet these needs by living the true qualities of your archetype.
Have Regular Letting-Go Rituals
Have regular rituals that help you let go of the regrets from your past. For example, have a morning routine to forgive yourself and picture releasing and letting any stuck blocked energy go from your body into your creator’s light. Any blockage of energy in your body can lead to adverse health conditions, and diseases, blockage of your chakras, and stop the free flow of energy within your body.
You can also write down how you are feeling on a piece of paper and then burn that piece of paper as you let that feeling go. Don’t waste your present moments thinking about the past. We are not here to live our lives looking backward to the past. Every day is a gift and it is to be lived fresh and not by bringing your baggage from the past.
Enjoy the moments that you have now before it’s too late because we’re only here temporarily. Your future is not guaranteed however your present is.
In conclusion, you now know that self-forgiveness is your ability to acknowledge, admit, and accept that you made a mistake and did something wrong, forgive yourself, and take the appropriate actions to rectify what is in your control with yourself or others if your behavior has caused them to suffer.
If it is not possible to rectify then let the resulting resentment, guilt, shame, anger, despair, and all the hurt go by growing and learning lessons from the experience.
It is practiced as an act of self-love and it is therefore independent and not reliant on the other person’s actions, behavior, capability, and capacity to accept your forgiveness which is not at all in your control. You forgive yourself so you can feel at peace on the inside.
Self-forgiveness is important because it is an act of unconditional love toward yourself. It is also empowering to know that you are not perfect nor should your ever pressure yourself to ever aspire to be. It is a way to accept and take full responsibility for your actions and it is known to improve your confidence, self-esteem, and worth.
If you cannot forgive yourself then the stuck energy of regret, resentment, and anger can lead to other adverse mental and physical health issues and conditions. Without self-forgiveness, it would be very hard for you to be motivated, and hopeful for your future, and to live your best confident, joyful, meaningful, purposeful, fulfilling, and impactful life. It is also hard to fully forgive others and have no regrets and resentment towards them if you cannot be compassionate towards yourself.
You also learned 7 ways to forgive yourself like no longer dwelling on the past, moving forward, reflecting on your consciousness, acknowledging your shadow self, having a creative outlet, figuring out unmet needs, and having regular letting go rituals.
I hope you will no longer punish yourself because of your past mistakes and have been inspired to love yourself unconditionally and be kind, and compassionate towards yourself.
Do not let your past actions define who you are for the rest of your life. Live your best life starting today!
Next, read Is it normal to have regrets in life for further helpful and insightful tips.