Are Friends More Influential Than Parents?
Are Friends More Influential Than Parents?
Children grow up so quickly and they soon go out into the world where they are influenced by many different things competing for their attention like the media, peers, teachers, etc.
Do parents always have the most influence on their children or are friends more influential than parents?
Most parents are the children’s most significant influence and role model up to a certain age when there is less opportunity for outside influences to take over. However, whether that continues to be the case throughout their lives will depend on their relationship with their parent(s).
If the child does not feel securely attached to their parents and has parents who are either absent, neglectful, very judgmental, or non-accepting, making them believe they are not enough and are constantly comparing them to others (siblings, friends) then the chances are higher that the parent’s influence will become less and less trusted over friends who are more accepting and not judgmental of them.
So, how do you remain influential in your child’s life so that you can always be approachable, trusted, and available to guide them when needed? Let’s discuss that next.
8 Ways to Make Sure Your Kids Seek Your Advice (At Any Age)
Every parent wants their child to feel like they can come to them for advice when needed. However, let’s be honest many kids grow up and stop seeking advice from their parents. Why?
Because trust and connection are not built overnight. Here are 8 ways to create an environment where your children not only value your advice but actively seek it no matter their age.
Listen More Than You Speak
When a child feels heard, they will come to you again. Most parents rush to give advice, but children need to feel understood first. Instead of interrupting, ask, “Tell me more.” Validate their emotions before offering guidance.
Be A Safe Space, Not A Judge
Your child will not come to you if they fear punishment or judgment. If your child thinks you will overreact, they will turn to someone else for advice. Create a space where they can tell you anything without fear.
Admit When You Are Wrong
Vulnerability builds trust. When you own your mistakes, your child learns that wisdom is not about being perfect it is also about learning. Saying “I was wrong, and I have learned from it” makes your advice more credible.
Share Lessons, Not Just Rules
Kids do not just need rules they need the ‘why’ behind them. Instead of saying, “Do not do that,” explain, “I made this mistake when I was younger, and here is what I learned.” Personal stories make your advice stick.
Respect Their Independence
Your child is a person, not a project. If you try to control every decision, they will rebel or shut you out. Instead, guide them with wisdom, then let them make choices. When they trust you respect their autonomy, they will keep coming back for advice.
Lead By Example
Your actions teach louder than your words. If you want your child to value your wisdom, live it. Show kindness, humility, and integrity in your own life, and they will naturally seek your guidance.
Show Them You Trust Their Judgement
The more you believe in them, the more they will believe in themselves. If you constantly question their choices, they will stop seeking your input. Instead, say, “I trust you will make the right decision, but if you need help, I am here.”
Always Keep The Door Open
No matter what they do, they need to know they can always come home. Even if they make mistakes or pull away, never make them feel unwelcome. A child who knows they are unconditionally loved will always return for advice when they need it.
In conclusion you now know most parents are the children’s most significant influence and role model up to a certain age when there is less opportunity for outside influences to take over.
However, whether that continues to be the case throughout their lives will depend on their relationship with their parent(s).
You also learned 8 ways to make sure your kids always seek your advice (at any age) like listening more than speaking, not judging and being a safe space, admitting you are wrong when justified, sharing lessons not just rules, respecting their independence, leading by example, showing them you trust their judgment and always keeping the door open.
The foundation you build today determines whether your child will seek your advice for life. Start now. Listen more, judge less, and always keep the door open!
Next, read what is an unhealthy parent-child relationship for further helpful insights and tips.