Can Childhood Trauma Affect Your Relationships?
Can Childhood Trauma Affect Your Relationships?
I believe that we tend to live a happier and more fulfilling life when we have loving, trusting, and nurturing relationships with people around us.
Are all relationships always good or can the childhood traumas that you experienced affect your relationships as an adult?
Childhood trauma and wounds can most definitely have an effect on your relationships as an adult. It is known to lead to an inability to manage emotions, effectively communicate and respond to circumstances and challenges that we encounter when we are in a relationship with other people.
It is important to identify and heal these wounds and traumas to improve relationships learn to better master your emotions and reduce negative emotions like anxiety, worry, shame, guilt, anger, and feelings of helplessness and hopelessness.
Healing and working through your wounds and traumas will also lead to better mental health and reduce your chances of suffering from depression, suicidal thoughts, self-harm, and the potential to form unhealthy addictions.
So, you may be wondering next how childhood trauma and wounds can affect romantic relationships. Let’s find out the answer to that next.
How Childhood Trauma Can Affect Romantic Relationships
Traumatic experiences and wounds from childhood can impact brain development, and cause the formation of limiting beliefs, negative habitual thoughts, and insecure attachment styles which can prevent you attracting the right romantic partner and having an amazing fulfilling romantic relationship.
Children who have stable relationships with their parents tend to form stable relations with their romantic partners as adults in comparison to the children who have unstable relationships with their parents.
Here are 5 different love styles that you can potentially develop as an adult if you have unhealed childhood traumas and wounds according to a study conducted by Dr. Milan and Yerkovich.
People Pleaser
You would make it your life’s mission to always please others if you grew up in a household where your parents were always angry, had very high unreasonable expectations, and always criticized you. You grew up feeling never unheard, unseen, unaccepted, or understood.
You tend to not value your own opinion, have a hard time saying no, have no boundaries, give in easily, and always put other’s happiness above your own.
You fear abandonment, avoid conflict to prevent creating further anger in other people and so you give in and do whatever your partner tells you to do without expressing how you feel and giving your true opinion.
Always remember that you are a soul with a body like your partner. You are both equal as souls and therefore make sure you are treated as an equal partner in your relationship. You are just as valuable and significant as your partner.
You are a soul and your true qualities are purity, love, peace, joy, compassion, wisdom and power. You matter, are enough, and were perfectly made for the purpose that you are here to fulfill or you would not be here right now.
Victim
You would act like a victim in a relationship if there was a lot of chaos and violence in your home environment as a child. You had to hide because you did not feel valued and safe.
You tend to feel anxious, and depressed and probably suffer from low self-esteem and worth. You would attract and accept a partner who is very controlling because you feel that you do not deserve anything better.
You are a very powerful, and wise soul that has been sent on this earth by your creator for a purpose. You were built perfectly for your purpose. You can also connect and access your creator’s power, strength, and intelligence.
You deserve the best life full of infinite possibilities despite the type of childhood wounds and traumas that you may have experienced.
It is time to acknowledge and tap into your inner strength and power and make sure you are treated as an equal soul by your partner.
Controller
You become controlling when you grew up in a household where you did not feel safe and protected as a child. You are independent, emotionally tough, and prefer to hide your true emotions instead of being vulnerable and expressing them.
You have a lot of anger which you use as a weapon to scare other people. You tend to be very rigid and not very spontaneous because you feel that spontaneity leads to unsafety.
Know without a doubt that you have the power within you to create your best life. You attract what you believe, think about, speak, and act on.
The sooner you can change your beliefs and thoughts and adopt the ones that help you feel empowered to serve the purpose that you came here to fulfill the better your life will get. You are a powerful Soul that was created in your Creator’s image. You have to know and believe without a doubt that you are always safe and protected.
Vacillator
If you grew up in a very unpredictable, unstable environment and your needs were not your parent’s priority you will probably be indecisive, have a fear of abandonment, and have a hard time staying in a committed relationship.
You would always be seeking new relationships because you fear that if you stay in a relationship long the person will eventually leave you.
You are special, worthy, matter, and are enough just the way you or you would not be here. You deserve to be with the right romantic partner who will treat you like an equal soul, celebrate and accept you, and help you grow and heal.
Avoider
You would be distant, value personal space, and unemotional, and turn into an avoider if you did not experience any affection and comfort from your parents as a child.
You are probably very independent, a loner, and detached. You feel that for you to stay in your power you have to be alone or else you risk not getting affection from a partner.
You don’t have to avoid finding a partner, be emotionally detached, and stay isolated and alone for the rest of your life. There are plenty of people who will treat you as an equal Soul and will be willing to grow and heal with you in a loving and fulfilling partnership.
You are 100% responsible for creating the type of life that you want to live as an adult by having the right identity, beliefs, thoughts, feelings, behavior, words, actions, habits, and character.
You have the power within you to change your life heal yourself live the life you were created to live and fulfill your purpose by helping others awaken and grow.
In conclusion, you now know that childhood trauma and wounds can most definitely have an effect on your relationships as an adult.
It is also known to lead to an inability to manage emotions, effectively communicate and respond to circumstances and challenges that we encounter when we are in a relationship with other people.
You also know that traumatic experiences and wounds from childhood can also impact brain development, and cause the formation of limiting beliefs, and insecure attachment styles in adulthood which can prevent you from finding the right partner.
You learned about the 5 different love styles that you can potentially develop as an adult if you have unhealed childhood traumas and wounds according to a study done by Dr. Milan and Yerkovich which are pleaser, victim, controller, vacillator, and avoider.
I hope you will consider identifying and healing from any childhood wounds and traumas that you may have experienced as a child that could prevent you from finding your ideal romantic partner that you deserve.
Next, why is a parent child relationship important read for further helpful insights and tips.